He watched her as her eyes twinkled, the light from the tv reflected onto her gorgeous red hair he reached over & slipped his fingers in between hers, he kissed her head gently & began to tell her what was on his mind. She started to cry, he wiped away her tears and kissed her cheek.
“Baby can you please just talk to me and tell me what you’re thinking? I know I shouldn’t have told her what happened between us but she has a hold on me, she has such a tight grip that she squeezes me a little and I talk, I let out everything when she’s around” he told her as he moved closer to her.
“of all the things why tell her I got raped J? Why let her talk to me tha way? Why didn’t you stop her when she threatened to tell everyone? Why did you stop me when I wanted to fight back?” She asked him in a calm & quiet voice.
“Cause she’s always been that way babe…”
“Who cares anymore? I don’t care & I’m just done trying to be your girl when I miss you so much and you can’t even try to move on from her. You can’t even spend 2 minutes with me without thinking of her J!”
J got off Nicole’s bed, stood in front of her, tilted her chin up so he could look into her beautiful eyes and tell her that she’s apart of his past and he wants to start over fresh with her and he wants a new relationship where he’s appreciated. She grabbed him, pulled him down to her level and kissed him passionately.
“I don’t want any other guy J, I want you. But I can’t be with you right now because she’s in my way of being with you, so I’m gonna be here waiting for when she moves her fat a**. Because you’re right I care way to much about you.”
I can’t do this anymore… She can keep you a secret and since you’re under her little spell you’re okay with it but you don’t get that you’re keeping me a secret from the chick who left you to go date you’re BEST friend. It’s not fair to you or I. I love you with all my heart and you’ll always have a spot in my heart but I’m tired of always getting the short end of the stick. You make me feel like I’m just another chick for you to string along & play games with. Yeah its all about me when you it to be but when I’m not physically around you I don’t exist, you put her before me all the damn time. You make me feel like all I am to you is you’re little doll. We do it all on your terms. Well go f her. I’m just done being the stupid girl who sits hoping that one day you’ll realize how much I love you and how much you mean to me. I keep hoping that one day you’re gonna feel the same way about me. But I understand now that’s never gonna happen. I’m always gonna be number 2 to you and I’m always gonna be the secret you’d die if anyone found out. I lay down at night wondering if everything you tell me is true. Do you really love me or do you just say that? I can’t do this to myself anymore. I’m done being you’re little puppet. Good luck in life. I really hope she gives you another chance, that she gives it to you like I did. I’m done being the stupid little girl.
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